I have decided

to be content with the decisions of authority.

It is becoming relatively normal for me to be content with the circumstances of my life over which I have complete control. Ha ha. It never occured to me before that the discipline of contentedness might supercede that position... until yesterday.

I have been PO'd big time with certain decisions that AIM (missions organization) has made concerning my trip next year. (I've used words like "infuriated" just to shed some clarity on my feelings.) They're decisions that really matter... and I think they made the wrong decision.

But here's the rub: will I miserably rebel or joyfully submit? UGH I HATE that choice. But it's one I make either consciously or unconsciously and one that will have lasting consequences.

So last night I gave up.

It's humbling and embarassing to admit my sin but I long for a pure heart before God... and this submission is an elementary step to holiness. So I let go. Who I will be with next year is in the hands of God. I acknowledge that and receive the decision as coming from his hand.

I will give thanks to the Lord for he is good.

So. Onward.